Category Archives: Advice

Why I went to Brighton Trans Pride with my Sex hat on?

5000 people are estimated to have attended Trans Pride march and gathering in Brighton last Saturday. I was one of them. The protest call of the day was: Trans Rights are Human Rights. Non-binary is valid. Trans men are men. Trans women are women. I was on the march, shouting this with everyone else. I also handed out 200 flyers

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Why genital massage should be on the (adult) National Curriculum

Many sexually active adults have never experienced being touched intimately with massage or in a mindful ‘massage style’. There are many reasons why genital massage should be a ‘thing’ that is recognised and taught in way more places. Here are just a few; We can DIY We can self-massage our genitals just as we can self-massage our shoulders or feet

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Valuable screen time; Realising the value of Somatic Sex Coaching

Somatic Sex Coaching – When I first certified as a Sexological Bodyworker, I was very orientated towards face to face work, in real time, where I could use the full range of exercises and body based tools I had learnt. If someone contacted me from an unreachable city, I would try to work out how I could get them to

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The forest speaks and the Sexological Bodyworker listens

Why is a Sexological Bodyworker blogging about Bruce Parry’s film Tawai; the Voice from the Forest? ‘Tawai: A voice from the Forest’ is a documentary film about people living lives very different from our own, the Penan tribe in Borneo. It is about how we are destroying our planet and making ourselves ill and unhappy, and destroying these last remaining

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Somatic Sex Coaches talk Body love and acceptance!

I attended a workshop on Sunday called Body Beloved by Sarah Rose-Bright*, a fantastic Sex Coach and sex educator. It was for people who identify as women, about being present in and loving and accepting our bodies (yes, very ambitious!). I last attended this workshop two years ago and it was called BodyLove then. I repeated the workshop because I

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Have you been hiding from touch? Why conscious touch is a thing

“…one of the most joyful aspects of being a human and being alive, how our bodies can experience sensation and you have a right to go on a pleasure-hunt!” There are many ways we might hide from touch, even at the very moment we are receiving it or giving it. Physical touch and intimacy can be so loaded and problematic

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Using ScarWork® for scars caused by self-harm

Content note: self-harm and picture of well healed scars. People who self-harm face a high degree of stigma, judgement and discrimination in our society. When someone does something that injures themselves, often the pain and distress is compounded by harsh and shaming treatment by hospital staff, psychiatric systems and sometimes by family and friends. What I am interested in is

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10 ways to create your Practice Space for Pleasure

It’s true that non human animals don’t have sex education classes or sexological bodywork! The fact is that from an early age we DO learn (well, actually more is caught than taught – we ‘catch’ ways of physically being in our bodies, in our appetites, in our pleasure, in searching for our sensory and somatic needs from the culture around us, our parents, teachers, media etc).

When resistance and perfectionism pops up in sex coaching

One of my words in my tagline is ‘Transformation’. When you read about Sexological Bodywork or somatic sexual education, you might have come across some of the practices we can use to get you more ‘in our body’ and increase erotic embodiment. You might have contemplated doing something like ‘orgasmic yoga’ or mindful erotic practices, or changing how you self-pleasure.

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But, why? I don’t get it. Why see a professional for something sexual?

As someone setting up a practice in the professional field of sex education and coaching (for more information click here), this question seems to hang in the air everywhere I go! It seems to be based on these beliefs; Sex is private and personal and should stay hidden. Sex should only happen in a relationship between 2 people in a

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